Immortality~This Blog~ My Children~

           My one and only wish is to live a long life, to be given the privilege of seeing my children grow, to watch them find themselves, their soul mates,  what drives them and makes them happy~ I want to have the privilege of having my grandchildren wrap their arms around my old wrinkled skin, hold my wrinkled little had, bake cookies with and find comfort on my lap...... As its most mothers wish to obtain this.... for me its not one many have achieved within my family..... My grandmother died at age 47, her siblings all except one also died young.... My mother lost her life at 45 and my grandfather in his 60's...... which has the fact we are all mortal always on my mind...... That's were this blog comes into play and why I started blogging.... not to become some famous blogger.....or for any notoriety.... its simply for two reasons... 1. So my family from far away can see our life as we know it right now.... and  2. So there is record of my thoughts, my love and aspirations for my children.... so that when it is my time to leave this world..... Laken and Brett have some sort of record...some sort of idea as to what my thoughts, ideas and hopes were in my 20's, 30's and on.....
     Since becoming a mother there are so many questions I have for my own Mum.... My Mum suffered horribly from mental illness, chrohns disease among other ailments until cancer took her and I unfortunately didn't know my mother before these things were apart of and eventually took over her life.... and although I know my mother loved me to the best of her ability I always wonder if there was ever a time where she was sincerely happy... her laugh was infectious .... and I can only hope there was a time where she laughed carefree...
  I'd love to ask her if she went through a transition of, who she was before kids, who she was at that time and who she aspired to be... or simple things like...was I a good sleeper? Does Brett get her sass from me?  All the things you never think to ask, don't know to ask...... That's why I feel this is on way I can give my kids insight, let them know how much I've always loved them and how life really was when they were small...
  Sooo to my babies.... here is my gift to you, Our life... as I see it...

 Here is my mom and I ......Out Camping in the Gap.. She would have been 23 and about 1.5 yrs old and although she was vocal about life being not as she envisioned it, I hope she found happiness in being a Mum when I was this small as I found great join in her love and warm hugs~