Mommy's Going for Surgery...

Mommy’s going for surgery…

 I’ve started to talk with our kids about my up coming surgery. Which I know a lot of people don’t agree with how I’m going about it but, if they haven’t realized yet… I don’t really care… Each parent knows their own child.. Every child is different.. and therefore you should do what is best for your child.  I am a nurse, I have the knowledge to inform my children correctly at their level and answer most if not all of their questions with factual based answers and rational… I don’t believe in lying to my children but that doesn’t mean I tell them everything either.. I feel that once you lie to a child who is curious you end up wasting an educational opportunity and end up causing yourself the stress of creating a lot more lies.. I’ve told Laken that mommy has to go in for another surgery ( as it’s not a new thing in our house, nor is it scary). I casually asked Laken while we were coloring if he knew I was going for surgery to his reply "of course" he said he “suspected it as he had heard me on the phone with the doctor” (just shows they hear a lot more then we think as he has never been in the room while I’ve been on the phone) I explained to him that he knew he had a grandma Anne who he’s never met, who had gotten sick and is now in heaven.. He said he knew as we go to visit the cemetery and talk about her lots.. I then explained to him that the reason I was having my surgery was to try and ensure I don’t get sick. So that I can live a really long time and get to meet my grandkids… Laken responded with “ that’s a great idea you’re going to love my kids.” We talked about how just like when I had Brett I was going to spend the night at the hospital and would be home the next day, but if I had to spend more than one day that was ok too.. We also talked about the fact I was going to have some incisions on my chest and some funny balls that were drains. That I might be really sore so cuddles would have to be gentle and on the couch. Laken is very inquisitive and thoughtful, asked if he could see my drains and could help me if I needed.. He’s asked some great questions, voiced some concerns.. Thought ahead to suggesting we put a stool in the jeep for Brett because I won’t be able to lift her in or himself when he has his hockey gear on already…  He’s asked how incisions get on the skin and what the doctor uses to close the skin..... And I’ve told him exactly how… now magic dust and a wave of a wand… surgical tools and sutures… I feel I’ve prepared my children for an open conversation in regards to what is planned for March and I feel as a result they will be less traumatized than if I were to tell them I was I was just going in to have an Ouchy fixed or nothing at all… This is how I chose to approach it with my children and it’s not going to be right for everyone..... but I hope years down the road when and if Laken and Brett are reading this they appreciate the fact Mark and I chose to be open and honest…